Autumn is dead. Here are mugshots for its tombstone. It was back in October when one could still go out without risking death of exposure. Oh well. One more reason not to go out.
Remember that before the coming of this shitty slush, all was lush green? You don’t? Me neither. But I have pictures to prove it.
In response to WP Weekly Photo Challenge: Cheeky.
I was flirting with the idea of posting a snap of my literal cheeks for the challenge (not face cheeks, as I don’t post my face all over the internet, the other ones (as I totally post my ass all over the internet?)). But I can do better than a Kardashian. So in lieu of a butt, there’s this phallic little guy poking out of the picture (a stunted sprout? Whatever it’s called in English and in botany; Freud would call it a phallic symbol, and who am I to oppose Freud, right?).
In response to Cardinal’s Changing Seasons challenge.
I thought I’d never go out in November. And I didn’t go out. I rode a bike. That was my third attempt at the bike after fifteen years. It went poorly, and I don’t get farther than two kilometres. Then I collapse, catching for breath and fending off a heart attack. Obviously, yoga doesn’t prepare you for aerobic activities.
I deeply regretted venturing out. I nearly killed myself. I’m suicidal, perfectly normal, but dying while biking isn’t my preferred way to go. I also had the bad idea of revisiting my childhood woods. Apparently, they’ve been abandoned ages ago, so I was drowning in swamps and fighting through wild vegetation. Next time I’ll bring my machete.
Except there will be no next time. Even if I’m alive to see December, I’m not fucking crazy enough to go bike riding in December. And since I live in the middle of nowhere with little to no public transport, and since I’m not a car owner, and since I hate walking (apart from everything else), I don’t think there will be an opportunity to shoot changing seasons. Maybe from the window. As I said in October, I’m not going out the next month.
October is almost over, and so is the Changing Seasons challenge, and so are my dreams, hopes and desires. I’m kidding! I don’t remember ever having any. I do have photos though.
In response to WP Weekly Photo Challenge: Glow.
Changing Seasons is (soon was) the best challenge ever. My enthusiasm about this photo challenge is no way comprised by the fact that I hardly ever took part in it. To enjoy it while it lasts, here are my photos for this year’s September, which I actually did bother to take specifically for this purpose. Otherwise, I’m rarely bothered to take photos, unless mobile ones, which aren’t real photos really.
Don’t worry. There’s no literal shit here, just figurative shit. All snaps snapped on my way to Tesco because I don’t go anywhere else. I don’t have a life. What’s life anyway?
In response to Cardinal Guzman’s Changing Seasons challenge.
